Sunday, July 20, 2014

Slag Valley Bullett #4

Redemptionists Targeted!

By Ricco Chunk
The Redemptionist group known as The Human Torches twice found themselves on the wrong side of concerned religious equality groups recently, both times resulting in violence.  The Clobs made their feelings known after waiting to discus the merits of religious diversity, which quickly deteriorated into a gun battle where The Clobs were victorious. Several members of each group were injured, but none were thought to be life threatening. 
Later on that week The Sons of Slagarchy were also involved in an altercation with the Torches as they made their way to the newly refurbished gallows in the centre of Scourgefields, which resulted in the deaths of two members of the Goliath gang. Headcrusher, the spokesman & leader of the Sons has been quoted saying "Every time I go near them bastards, I lose good men! Slasher & Flailer are now rat bait all because someone's gob couldn't keep shut long enough to spring our trap." he then went on to state that "If I find out which sump brained moron started singing to alert them Torches,......it was Reginald. Crap.".

Security Cam Footage


"It is unlikely that there will be any Guilder sanctions on either gang as Redemptionists are by & large a menace to honest hive folk. If anything, we should give them medals!" Pukkle Manx, bookman for guilder Kloss Stunkole was overheard stating yesterday.

STOP PRESS - EMERGENCY MEMO LEAK

Editorial Following a tip off from a reputable source, our investigation team has gained access to a series of disturbing top secret documen...